Still coughing

I'm glad that my doctor warned me that I could be coughing like this for a month or more. I'd have thought he was over-exaggerating if he hadn't written the narcotic cough syrup for a refill. If I'm still coughing like this at the end of the cough syrup/capsules, I'll go in and see him again and see if we need to do anything else. Since I can't really exercise with this crap still attacking my lungs, I've decided that I'm going to try to take advantage of the time and clean house. At least I can sit and rest when I need to. It just sucks that my cough syrup is making me nauseated. Oh, well. Such are the joys of hydrocodone, right?

Back to your regularly scheduled blog reading. Eventually, I hope that this blog will actually get back to talking about wellness with regards to diet and exercise. I will direct your attention to the weight loss ticker on the left hand side of your screen, however. Astute viewers will notice the downward trend. Guess the Wellbutrin is helping.

Who'da thunk it?

Not me, that's for sure. The upper respiratory ick is NOT bronchitis, as I suspected. Neither is it simply an "upper (or lower) respiratory infection" or anything else run-of-the-mill. For these purposes, I'm even considering pneumonia as run-of-the-mill because I'd almost suspected it to be the case. Nopey. Nothing so simple for me.

Whooping Cough.

The -hell-?

Turns out that that lovely DPT vaccine we get as littles does, in fact, wear off. That's why we're supposed to get tetnus boosters. Someone forgot to mention to me, though, that there might be a pertussis booster. Oops. So, yeah, I'm going to talk to my doc when I go back about getting that done. *le sigh*

I've also gained 50 pounds since my last visit. We both thought it might not be the worst idea to go back on the Wellbutrin. I did some mental gymnastics and realized that I started gaining weight back when I went off of it. So, if all it does is keep my depression at bay enough to keep me from emotionally eating, it'll be worth the $5/month - especially since the extended release (read one pill/day) is now available as a generic. If I don't have to try to remember it 2X/day, I'll be OK.

Anyway, back to the cough. I'm on an antibiotic (3 days only, thank goodness) and 2 different types of cough medicine - one of which is a narcotic. So, at least I'm able to get some sleep now without coughing my head off. Of course, lying in bed listening to my lungs wheeze isn't my most favorite pastime, but I'll get over it. :-) So, yeah, no exercise for me for another week or so, at least. Not til it's out of my chest completely. At least I'm not running a fever now. The scary bit is that I never really did... Oh, well. That's what I get for thinking that a fever=contagious.

Sorry to any I may have inadvertently infected. :-(

Well, poo!

Sadly, my grandiose (I heart that word) plans to start back to exercising this week have been derailed by some sort of upper respiratory infection. *le sigh* I'm pondering the logistics of a doctor visit (leave early today & schlepp there and back on the bus, have the husband bring me in the AM and then to work, or have him come get me from work), but rest assured I will be going. I'm tired of coughing and feeling like crapdoodle. Iffin' I need an antibiotic, I'd rather go and get it over with so I can feel better soonest. YKWIM?

I'm sure that there are people out in the world who are clasping their chests screaming "It's the big one, Elizabeth!" over the fact that I'm actually going to the doc of my own accord and only 4 days into an illness. I really -am- trying to get better about taking care of myself. Really.

The plan tonight is to make it through work, go home, eat soup and go to bed.

Hope everyone else is doing better than I am right now. TTFN.

Darn it! Darn it! Darn it!

I'm so mad at myself right now. If that were productive, I'd let it continue, but it isn't. I've been binging on Halloween candy, and that has left me UP 5-ish pounds from last week. I've also not been light with the salt shaker, so I know that part of it is water retention. I can make all the excuses that I want to, but it comes down to the fact that I am fat and out of shape and I cannot seem to find the switch in my head that will help me eat what I need to be eating to most efficiently and effectively fuel my body. There are people who just naturally eat what they are supposed to, exercise the right amount, and stay naturally their ideal weight. Let's take a moment to define some terms, shall we?

Supposed to: In reference to eating, this means the fuel that runs the body at it's optimum levels, while helping it maintain its ideal weight (see "ideal weight").

Right amount: In reference to exercise, this means the amount needed to maintain healthy body systems, particularly cardiovascular and muscular systems.

Ideal weight: The number on a measuring device (i.e. scale) which reflects a body's healthy state. The healthy state means normal blood test results including blood glucose, cholesterol, triglycerides, and insulin, as well as all body functions happening at a normal level.

I don't give a rat's skinny behind whether I ever look like a supermodel. I never will, I'm about 6 inches too short, for one thing. :-) I want my body to be able to function and do what I ask it to do while having the energy with which to do it. Right now, sitting upright or standing for even 10-15 minutes requires superhuman effort. I am carrying around WAAAAAY too much extra mass, and it needs to go away. I'd be lying if I said I didn't care about appearance at all. I do. But I want to look my best, not some media-driven ideal.

So, how do I flip the switch in my head? I guess the first step would be to find out if I have that switch to begin with. Do I care enough about myself and my health to want to devote the time and energy it will take to shed over 100 pounds? If not, can I borrow someone else's give a shit? I know that there are other people who care enough about me and my health, so maybe I can borrow some caring about it from them if I don't have enough. If I find that I do have enough (or have borrowed some), do I have enough stamina to see the course? Will simply getting back onto Weight Watchers and getting back into the gym be enough? Do I have enough internal fortitude to get through this, or do I need help? If I need help, what form should it take? Is it as simple as finding the money to go to WW meetings once a week? Or do I need something more like accupuncture, hypnosis, or therapy? Or do I need something even more, like surgery? These are the questions I'm wrestling with. I know there are no easy answers. If acheiving and maintaining a healthy weight were easy, we wouldn't be the fattest country on the planet.

First step, though, is that I've declared a moritorium on Halloween candy. We will have no more in the house, thankyouverymuch. Second step, I took my AM walk break this morning. Even if I feel up to doing nothing else, I will do that. It showed me just how badly out of shape I've allowed myself to become. Third step, I did my WW Points quiz to find out how many Points I should have per day, and I will start counting Points again. I'll see if adding exercise and starting to count Points again will be enough for me to start seeing the scale's number move in the downward direction. If I'm not losing at all by doing that by the end of the year, I'll talk with the doc about it, and see what he recommends.

I'm still mad at myself, but it's easing off some.